星期六, 八月 30, 2008

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

=..=

i dont even know how to begin this...... but i have to say..... i've been uber suay this year..... i've lost so much money..... when i dont even gamble!

1st.... lost of handphone.... bought new one.... $100
2nd... paid for my own retainers, lost my lower jaw retainer.... bought new one..... total cost $503!!!
3rd... i pod got spinned in the washer..... i dont even know if im gonna get one.... its a freaking 4gb ipod!!!!!
4th.... why do all these have to happen when im saving up for a DSLR?

什么跟什么!今年一整年的工资就这样泡汤...



星期四, 八月 28, 2008

...离人...

或许你已注意到了,这个全新的博客版面...我个人还瞒喜欢的...

有人问...主页是不是坏了...怎么中英文...穿插一起...参枝不齐...顿时无言...懒得回应...

最近忙于课业上的点点滴滴...我都忘了给自己时间...喘口气

上周末...干了很多...异于生活常规的事...

很大的原因其实来自于最近...常泛起...当年多么想移民的欲望...

是...是欲望...因为没钱...因为这里还有很多亲人...

报章报导本地三分之二青少年曾有过移民的动机...

说实在的又有谁不想呢...对我而言...我也想踏出亚洲...看看伦敦的打笨种...巴黎的铁塔...如有机会...更想尝试到外国工作生活...

因此...当年发誓自己要在26岁之前移民...不管何处...找个新开始...我妈不也希望...在这里经历过的实在不想再去面对了...

小时候的我...无知的认为...这里好闷...没什么地方能让我大开眼界...

如今年跨20...突晓...原来...艺术之梦...根本不能在这圆吧...这个社会...在我看来常视艺术如同同X恋...似乎是违反了脚踏实地做人的原则...

留人处的定义到底是什么...我觉得...我很难适应...这里的生活准则...这里不是不好...而是我不适应...

不过话说回来...这也不过是个欲梦



星期日, 八月 24, 2008

cross over....

these few weeks... have been really turbulent for me...

there were avalanches of questions down pouring me... kept me wonder if im really gonna take this up for the rest of my life...

i didnt expect myself to be making such decisions at such age.... at the junction of 20 years of age... where should i progress on...?

questions taunting me.... makes me shiver the thought of going through it the rest of my life... i just dont like it enough yet....

there were times which i tried accepting it... but it came to no avail....

fate only comes when u really hit it off well for the first time ... not when you try to like it... and keep lingering on... thats not fate... but sheer pain....

星期三, 八月 20, 2008

大佬二



年迈二十...

此刻心情也不知是喜是哀,该乐该愁...记得当初迈入人生第十个岁月时...心情是无此的兴奋...因为岁数总算从单位数...步入双位数了!是的,小时候总会为这种无聊的事感到莫名的兴奋...

没想到...一转眼的时间...十年就过去了...十年前...我也不担心学业...当时考分流...也没抱太多期望...就如妈妈说的... “楼梯爬得上不要跌下来就好...“ 多简单的生活啊...

二十...究竟是人生的花样年华...或是...人生另一段...为成长而放弃单纯的延伸...

花样年华...清涩岁月...接近人生的另一个转捩点...眼前的路...是明亮的...或是黑暗的...只求能够平安度过...眼睛放亮一些...

今年的生日...虽然别具意义...却发现心里的平静...使自己已散发出浓浓的老气横秋...

有人说...二十岁之后的岁月...观阴真的会似箭般地飞跨...或许...那就是人生...别了十年又十年...一生忙忙碌碌...才发现...岁月已过...是时候休息了...不过...我好想...先歇歇...

星期五, 八月 01, 2008

难得一静

终于...报告写完了...

总算能平静地冥思...这飞逝的半年里...我究竟一直都在忙着什么...

记得大大大老板曾提起过一段 “忙、盲“ 言论...有感而发...

我这五个月里是盲着过日子吗?不尽全然...虽然偶尔工作上会有茫然时刻...不过至少...身边还是会有同事把你从梦的边远拉回现实....

梦醒时分...才惊觉...柳暗花明,又一村...

终于...细读了要求同事们留笔的纪念册...

看着姐姐笔间密密麻麻的文字...叫我感动也惭愧...原来姐姐一直都在默默地为我感到心痛...

敏感的她...看透了我善于用乐观掩饰内心里的悲观...看透了我超龄的成熟...

是的,真的觉得自己能活得豁达些...可是心里的鄣碍...并非一朝一夕所能瓦解...

其实...这一年...无论是在学业上...生活上...都是表现除了相当矛盾的一年...实在委屈

常与自己开玩笑说...入伍后...就任由...他们怎么的...去折磨我吧...反正又不是没被折磨过...我想...我心里曾有过的挣扎...以远超他们所能折磨的极限了吧?

我并不想因为崎岖的人生,而得到别人的同情...不过到了今时今日...我究竟还为了什么难过...我却惊觉...自己已说不出一个所以然...

是学业上的委屈?分数?因为不去中国?

是家庭上的委屈?爸爸?妈妈?哥哥?

是自己身上的委屈?看着身旁的人陆陆续续地入伍上大学...自己仍徘徊于原地?就为了当初那一个错误?

还是自己始终没办法摆脱的恶煞?是祸是福...我自己也不知道...心里的挣扎...该怎么说...

我喜欢以笑来掩饰自己的不安...让急促的内心...得到片刻的安宁...或许真的累了...是需要好好休息的时候了...

不过...我却在休息的时刻...逃避...也不知道...在逃避什么...或许...是青春的流失...或许...是生命的残酷...或许...是现实...或许...或许...或许...

想起...我每次都会...在这种时刻...奔向机场了望厅...看着飞机起飞...心里总是嚷嚷着:也...带我一起离开吧...